Classic April Fools Jokes - The Best Funny Jokes

Simple: put salt on the victim’s toothbrush. Then stand by to watch the surprised look on their face.

This is a one of the oldest April Fool’s Day pranks in the world! Take the top sheet off the victim’s bed, and tuck the bottom end under the top end of the mattress. Pull it down and then fold it back up so that the top end is where it would be if the bed was made normally. Replace the pillow, blanket, etc., and make up the bed like it was before. When the victim gets into bed, they’ll be surprised when they can’t slide their feet all the way down to the bottom of the bed!

What’s the difference between David Beckham and an airplane model kit?

One’s a glueless kit and the other’s a clueless git!

Which Search Engine does Arnold Schwarzenegger use?

Alta Vista baby.

What do you get when you cross a dinosuar with a pig?
A: Jurassic pork!

Clinton vs Titanic

Similarities between the Titanic video and the Clinton grand jury testimony video:

Titanic: $9.99 on the Internet
Clinton: $9.99 on the Internet

Titanic: over 3 hours long
Clinton: over 3 hours long

Titanic: The story of Jack and Rose, their forbidden love, a subsequent catastrophe
Clinton: The story of Bill and Monica, their forbidden love, a subsequent catastrophe

Titanic: villain - White Star Line
Clinton: villain - Ken Starr

Titanic: Jack is a starving artist
Clinton: Bill is a B.S. artist

Titanic: In one part, Jack enjoys a good cigar
Clinton: Ditto for Bill

Titanic: During ordeal, Rose’s dress gets ruined
Clinton: Ditto for Monica

Titanic: Jack teaches Rose to spit
Clinton: Let’s not go there

Titanic: Rose gets to keep her jewelry
Clinton: Monica forced to return her gifts

Titanic: Behind the scenes, Leonardo DiCaprio is wildly popular
Clinton: Behind the scenes, Bill has a 70% approval rating

Titanic: Jack surrenders to an icy death
Clinton: Bill goes home to Hillary

Limp Bizkit and Dennis Rodman are on a sinking ship. Who gets saved?

The music world and the NBA…

Why did Dennis Rodman get kicked out of the game?

Because his purse didn’t match his shoes.

What does Bjork do when she’s horny?

She watches pjorn.

World’s thinnest books
20. BEAUTY SECRETS by Janet Reno
19. HOME BUILT AIRPLANES by John Denver
18. HOW TO GET TO THE SUPER BOWL by Dan Marino
17. THINGS I LOVE ABOUT BILL by Hillary Clinton
16. MY LIFE’S MEMORIES by Ronald Reagan
15. THINGS I CAN’T AFFORD by Bill Gates
14. THINGS I WOULD NOT DO FOR MONEY - by Dennis Rodman
13. THE WILD YEARS - by Al Gore
12. AMELIA EARHART’S GUIDE TO THE PACIFIC OCEAN
11. AMERICA’S MOST POPULAR LAWYERS
10. DETROIT - A TRAVEL GUIDE
9. DR. KEVORKIAN’S COLLECTION OF MOTIVATIONAL SPEECHES
8. EVERYTHING MEN KNOW ABOUT WOMEN
7. EVERYTHING WOMEN KNOW ABOUT MEN
6. ALL THE MEN I’VE LOVED BEFORE - by Ellen DeGeneres
5. MIKE TYSON’S GUIDE TO DATING ETIQUETTE
4. SPOTTED OWL RECIPES - by the EPA
3. THE AMISH PHONE DIRECTORY
2. MY PLAN TO FIND THE REAL KILLERS - by O. J. Simpson And the World’s Number One Shortest book…
1. MY BOOK OF MORALS - by Bill Clinton